TAPROOT THERAPY NYC
  • Home
  • Our Team
    • Therapists
    • Clinical Trainee Program
    • Leadership
  • Autism Evaluations
  • Blogs
    • Taproot Blog: Pscyhoeducation for Clients and Providers
    • Our Newsletter
  • Insurance and Cost
  • Policies and Procedures
  • Contact
  • Home
  • Our Team
    • Therapists
    • Clinical Trainee Program
    • Leadership
  • Autism Evaluations
  • Blogs
    • Taproot Blog: Pscyhoeducation for Clients and Providers
    • Our Newsletter
  • Insurance and Cost
  • Policies and Procedures
  • Contact
Search

TAPROOT BLOG:
​PSYCHOEDUCATION FOR CLIENTS AND PROVIDERS

What Anxiety Really Looks Like in Children: Signs Parents Often Miss

6/29/2026

 
By Emma Dall, Taproot Therapy Clinical Trainee

When many people think of anxiety, they picture someone who is constantly worrying or talking about their fears. While this can be true, anxiety in children often looks very different. Many children don't have the words to explain what they're feeling, so their anxiety shows up through their behaviors, emotions, or even physical symptoms.

Because of this, anxiety can easily be mistaken for shyness, defiance, perfectionism, or simply "acting out." Understanding how anxiety presents in children can help parents recognize when their child may need additional support.


1. Irritability and Emotional Outbursts
Children experiencing anxiety may become more irritable than usual. They might have frequent meltdowns, cry over small problems, or become easily frustrated when things don't go as planned.


This isn't because they're trying to be difficult. Anxiety keeps a child's nervous system on high alert, making it harder to manage everyday stressors. What may seem like an overreaction is often a sign that they're feeling overwhelmed.


2. Physical Complaints
Children often experience anxiety physically before they can recognize it emotionally. Common symptoms include:


  • Stomach aches
  • Headaches
  • Nausea
  • Difficulty sleeping
  • Fatigue

You may notice these complaints before school, sports practices, birthday parties, or other situations that feel stressful. While it's always important to rule out medical concerns, recurring physical symptoms without a clear cause can sometimes be linked to anxiety.


3. Avoidance
Avoidance is one of the most common signs of anxiety. A child may refuse to attend school, avoid social events, hesitate to try new activities, or cling to a caregiver during transitions.

Although allowing children to avoid situations may bring temporary relief, it can unintentionally reinforce anxiety over time. Gradually building confidence through support and practice is often more helpful than avoiding the situation altogether.


4. Perfectionism
Not all anxious children appear nervous. Some become perfectionists, placing a great deal of pressure on themselves to get everything "just right."

They may become upset over small mistakes, spend excessive time completing assignments, or avoid trying something new unless they're certain they'll succeed. Beneath this perfectionism is often a fear of making mistakes, disappointing others, or not being "good enough."


5. Constant Reassurance Seeking
Does your child frequently ask questions like:
  • "Are you sure everything will be okay?"
  • "Did I do this right?"
  • "What if something bad happens?"
  • "Will you stay with me?"

While occasional reassurance is normal, repeated reassurance seeking can be a sign that your child is struggling to tolerate uncertainty. Although answering these questions may help in the moment, the relief is often temporary, leading them to seek reassurance again and again.


6. Difficulty Concentrating
An anxious mind is often busy thinking about "what if" scenarios, making it difficult for children to stay focused. This can sometimes be mistaken for inattention or lack of motivation.

Children with anxiety may appear distracted in class, struggle to complete assignments, or have trouble following directions. This is not because they aren't trying, but because their minds are occupied by worries.


When Should Parents Seek Additional Support?
It's important to remember that every child experiences worry from time to time. Feeling nervous before a big test, trying something new, or meeting new people is a normal part of growing up. However, if anxiety begins interfering with your child's daily life, such as their ability to attend school, make friends, participate in activities, sleep well, or enjoy things they once loved, it may be time to seek additional support.

Anxiety doesn't always look the way we expect it to. Sometimes it appears as tears instead of fear, anger instead of worry, or stomachaches instead of anxious thoughts. The behaviors that seem confusing on the surface may actually be your child's way of communicating that they're struggling.

The good news is that anxiety is highly treatable. With early support, children can learn to understand their emotions, develop healthy coping skills, and build confidence in navigating challenges. Recognizing the signs is the first step toward helping your child feel understood, supported, and empowered to thrive.


References
  • Ronald M. Rapee, R. M., Heidi J. Lyneham, H. J., et al. (2010). Developments in the prevention and early intervention of anxiety disorders. Journal of Child Psychology and Psychiatry, 51(5), 548–561
  • American Psychological Association. (2020). Understanding child anxiety. https://www.apa.org/topics/anxiety/childhood-anxiety
  • American Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry. (n.d.). Anxiety disorders: Parents' medication guide and facts for families. https://www.aacap.org
  • National Institute of Mental Health. (n.d.). Children and mental health. https://www.nimh.nih.gov/health/topics/child-and-adolescent-mental-health​


Comments are closed.

    RSS Feed

    Categories

    All
    Autism
    Distress Tolerance
    Emotion Regulation
    Interpersonal Effectiveness
    Mindfulness

    Archives

    July 2026
    June 2026
    April 2026
    March 2026
    February 2026
    January 2026
    November 2025
    October 2025
    August 2025
    June 2025
    April 2025
    March 2025
    February 2025
    January 2025
    December 2024
    November 2024
    October 2024
    September 2024
    May 2024
    February 2024
    January 2024
    December 2023
    November 2023
    October 2023
    September 2022
    July 2022
    April 2022
    March 2022
    January 2022
    December 2021
    October 2021
    September 2021
    June 2021
    April 2021
    March 2021
    February 2021
    January 2021
    December 2020

Picture
​
​
​Taproot Therapy, LCSW, PLLC

[email protected]

​285 Lexington Avenue
Suite 2A
New York, NY 10016

​
​Information


Policies and Procedures
​
Insurance And Cost
Contact Us

Podcast
  • Home
  • Our Team
    • Therapists
    • Clinical Trainee Program
    • Leadership
  • Autism Evaluations
  • Blogs
    • Taproot Blog: Pscyhoeducation for Clients and Providers
    • Our Newsletter
  • Insurance and Cost
  • Policies and Procedures
  • Contact